Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Did you get your ashes?

It's that time again, time to give up something you love and not eat meat on Fridays. I used to think of this day as such a burden. Who wants to give up stuff they love? I certainly never used to take it seriously. I look back at all of the times I would sneak meat on Fridays and say I was giving up something I could easily do without and I realize that perhaps I didn't fully understand the meaning of Lent. I'm not sure I still do, I like to think my return to Church is a learning journey and I still have plenty of unanswered questions. My interpretation of giving up something I love for Lent is to make you focus on who you are as a person. Can I live without this item for 40 days? When it gets tough can I pull through? Do I ask for help? Who do I turn to when I feel weak? All of these questions led me to one answer, God. This "item" I gave up for Lent can perhaps be a metaphor of my life. I have found that when there is nothing left to help the situation I pray. I hadn't prayed in a very long time....my mom got sick in December of '09 and had to have major brain surgery. When I couldn't cope anymore I began to pray. I asked others to pray as well and I believe that is the reason why my mother is healthy and recovered today. She is not 100% yet but she is working on it. I have learned that I cannot become stressed over things I cannot control. It is what I pray about when I go to Church among other things.
Joe and I both decided that going back to Church was the right thing to do. We realized that we were both spiritually out of balance....and maybe if we tried to get back on track with our faith we could learn how to better manage the hardships that have happened and probably have yet to happen in our lives. Life is difficult enough, why deal with the everydays on your own when God can help. We are still working on giving back to our community. We are brainstorming charity ideas...lets face it I need to plan these things because Adrianna does not leave time for much else. I think it is time we give back. We have been blessed with a lot and whether it be working a blood drive or a homeless shelter I think we will feel as if we are making a difference. I am very tactile, I need to physically do and see immediate results in order to feel satisfied....might explain why my weight loss efforts are non existent at the moment, ha!

Don't get me wrong, I am not preaching nor have I become a person that turns to God for every little thing. This is more of a personal change. I still drink and like to party and have a good time. I am just willing to put more thought into the things I do for the sake of Adrianna...I am her example and I believe she is soaking everything I do in. I may want to stop the cursing and lounging and show her that it is better to be active....I'm working on it! =) I still have a lot of growing to do in my relationship with God and with Jesus. I am choosing to work on that relationship and explore how it will affect not only my life but my daughter's life. I would like her to have a well rounded view of how the world works. How can I teach my child about God and Jesus and our faith if I am not comfortable with my own understanding in the topic. I hope that Joe and I keep our promise of turning back to Church, it feels great so far and we only have a lifetime to go. BTW, Joe gave up swearing for Lent. Let's see how THAT goes, ha! I gave up diet Coke...my only option is drinking water because I don't like anything else...well maybe an occasional glass of wine =)

And now, here is a picture of Gods greatest gift to me:
How can you resist this face!

1 comment:

  1. Very encouraging post! So proud of your commitments and love for your daughter!

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