Pre-deployment

Now don't freak out, Joe is getting deployed technically but it is within the US and partially overseas so it isn't so bad. But because he will be in deployment status come March, we had to do a pre-deployment meeting at the airman family readiness center. Now I know that this is going to be a fairly easy 4 month deployments only because I will know where he is and what he is doing the majority of the time and I will even get to visit him for extended periods of time. Why I can't go the full time I will explain in another post...but essentially I could have. We started off the meeting fine, in my mind I thought it was silly to be doing this because it wasn't like he was going to be overseas so the separation wasn't going to be emotional for me or hard for us. The minute the ssgt started to mention the empty seat at the dinne table and the lonely weekends I lost it....water works out of no where! I did not expect to cry at this meeting. We knew what to except with this "why are we even calling it a deployment" deployment. He volunteered, we have known of a while he was leaving. But today when the ssgt started speaking of all of the birthdays and anniversaries Joe would miss out on and how Adrianna may act out at first because she will sense the change (he says his 2 year old felt the change for a few weeks but then was fine) I couldn't help but cry. A deployment is a deployment no matter what or where. This is what I want to stress with this post. I hold a special place in my heart for my friends who have significant others or loved ones deployed overseas for months or even years, I really feel for them and can't imagine how they live their daily lives without breaking down. I admire them, really. But my husband will be missing out on four months of our family daily livings. He will miss our five year anniversary, our daughters 2nd birthday, and just hangin out on a Saturday morning taking a drive to new Hampshire just to explore. It is going to be hard. Not as hard as it could be but still hard. I get to visit sometime in April and right before he goes overseas which I am looking forward to doing. I plan on spending some time here at home with Adrianna, doing our daily routines. I have plenty of friends around that will keep me company so I am grateful. In may I may go to NY for a month or so and spend time with my family and with Joe's family which will be nice. I may find myself down in NY quite a few times, i am not one to feel lonely....I don't like it.

So here's hoping time flies without the hubby here and we can get back to our normal routines soon after he returns sometime late July. I'm thinking I am going to just keep myself busy in the mean time...